I personally believe that life purpose is something we remember from a spiritual perspective rather than something we create. Of course, this depends on a person’s beliefs, and their viewpoint may differ. For me, I remembered my purpose when I discovered my passion—helping and motivating others to reach their full potential. I believe my purpose was already determined before I was born, but it remained dormant or was gradually unfolding as I matured. When the time was right, I became aware of it, understood it, and eventually began embodying it. This process has been gradual, but now my purpose is very clear to me: to learn, to experience, and to serve others. I believe there was a reason for me to come back to Earth, meaning my purpose was already determined before birth. Once my soul defined this purpose, it had to manifest it into reality—into a physical form—so I was born with this purpose written inside me. But here’s the key: It’s not that you are looking for your purpose. Your purpose has always been guiding you. We often think of purpose as something we must actively seek, as if it’s hidden somewhere outside of us. But in reality, our purpose is always present, subtly directing us through our experiences, passions, and even challenges. The process of life itself is designed to help us remember and align with it. An Analogy: The Meeting of Forgotten Purpose Imagine we all have a condition—not Alzheimer’s, but a type of forgetfulness where we remember bits and pieces, just not everything clearly. We find ourselves in a meeting but don’t remember why we’re there. The entire time, we’re trying to recall the purpose of the meeting and our role in it. We try different things to spark our memory, hoping to find something that feels right, but nothing fully clicks. Since our memory is unreliable, we rely on feelings and intuition. Deep down, we sense we’re in the right place—we planned to be here—but we’re not truly fulfilling our purpose because we don’t fully remember what we came to do. Others in the meeting are in the same situation. Some might remember more than others. Together, we start piecing together clues, helping each other recover fragments of our memory. As more people remember, the purpose of the meeting becomes clearer, and soon, things start moving in the right direction. The key to feeling at peace isn’t just remembering the purpose—it’s fulfilling it. Once we recall why we’re here, the anxiety and frustration fade, giving us clarity. Instead of spending all our time just trying to remember, we can focus on doing what we came here to do—contributing, making a difference, and even helping others remember their purpose too. For Spiritual and Non-Spiritual Perspectives For those on a spiritual path, the journey of purpose looks like this: Higher purpose → Manifested → Living and remembering our higher purpose → Fulfilling our purpose. For those who do not hold spiritual beliefs, purpose can still be deeply meaningful: Nothing → Something → Lost/Confused → Finding a purpose → Fulfillment. Even without believing in a higher purpose, one can still enter “the meeting” with a reason—to learn, to contribute, and to experience life. There’s nothing wrong with not believing in spiritual destiny. The key is long-lasting fulfillment, rather than chasing fleeting goals. Why Does Purpose Seem to Change? Why is it that sometimes we feel certain about pursuing something, only to realize later that it no longer feels right? Because your goal was never meant to last forever. It may have even been aligned with your larger purpose, but only as a fraction of what you were meant to accomplish. The universe guides you into doing something, then out of it, so you can continue fulfilling your greater purpose. Mind vs. Soul: The Illusion of Purpose Purpose exists for the mind at the human level—it needs direction to continue its journey. But the soul is already living its purpose, patiently progressing according to a greater plan. The struggle comes because the mind, limited by ego and human perception, cannot fully comprehend the soul’s deeper purpose. In many cases, the mind’s pursuit of purpose originates from the ego. The ego seeks identity, validation, and significance. It wants to feel special, to achieve something, to leave a mark. This is why people sometimes chase goals that later feel empty—because they were ego-driven rather than soul-aligned. But when the mind finally recognizes the soul’s true purpose, the two align, and purpose is naturally fulfilled. In other words, the moment you realize your true purpose, you are already living it. Whether you feel like you’ve accomplished or fulfilled your purpose is simply the mind trying to measure and understand something that was always in motion. A Lesson from 50 First Dates In 50 First Dates, Adam Sandler’s character, Henry, can be seen as a representation of God/Spirit Guide or an awakened friend trying to help someone (Lucy) recover her memory—just like how an awakened soul helps those who are still “asleep” remember their true purpose. Henry knows that Lucy will likely forget everything by the next morning, yet he has no expectations or frustration. Instead, he patiently works with her, bringing joy into her life each day. He meets her where she is, without force or pressure. Lucy, despite her memory loss, still experiences happiness in her day-to-day life. And Henry, through his unwavering commitment, lives with a sense of purpose every day. This mirrors the journey of awakening—some people forget who they are and why they’re here, but those who remember can gently guide them, not by forcing remembrance, but by being present, patient, and leading with love. In the end, whether one remembers or not, the key is to live with joy and purpose in each moment. “The world exists because of you, not the other way around.” - FeelaSoulphy
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Seeking approval can be a powerful motivator, driving you to achieve higher and larger goals than you might without it. This behavior aligns with the need for external validation, where your sense of self-worth becomes tied to others’ opinions. However, this same force can also become a never-ending source of suffering, much like being on a hedonic treadmill. No matter how much success you achieve, the feeling of accomplishment is short-lived, and you’re left continually seeking more approval. As a result, you may never feel truly accomplished, even when you’ve achieved significant success. You may not even realize that you're seeking approval, as this behavior can be buried deep in your subconscious. Here are some signs to help you recognize it, along with actionable steps to overcome these tendencies: 1. You get upset when someone challenges your ideas. Why this happens: When your sense of worth is tied to approval, disagreements feel like personal attacks rather than opportunities to learn. Solution: Shift your mindset from seeking validation to seeking growth. Embrace challenges as a way to expand your understanding and consider others' perspectives. 2. You feel a rush of happiness when someone agrees with you, and you want to feel it again. Why this happens: This is a form of external validation where your happiness relies on others’ approval. Solution: Practice self-validation. Ask yourself, “Do I believe in my idea or action regardless of others’ approval?” Develop the habit of internally affirming your decisions based on your values. 3. You often feel superior to others or thrive in competitive environments. Why this happens: Competition can be a way to seek validation by proving you're better than others. Solution: Focus on collaboration instead of competition. Aim to grow alongside others rather than surpassing them. Shift from ego-driven goals to community-oriented objectives. 4. You're addicted to the feeling of success and need to keep achieving more. Why this happens: Achieving success can create a "high," but when that fades, you may feel empty and seek another achievement to fill the void. Solution: Reframe success as an ongoing journey rather than a destination. Practice mindfulness and celebrate your small wins along the way. Develop a sense of contentment with where you are in the present moment. 5. You love recognition and crave being noticed or acknowledged for your efforts. Why this happens: The need for recognition can stem from a lack of internal self-worth. Solution: Cultivate self-recognition. Journaling can help—write down your accomplishments daily and appreciate them, even if no one else does. Practice recognizing your value independent of external praise. 6. You love to argue or prove your point. Why this happens: Constantly defending your ideas can be a way of seeking validation for your beliefs. Solution: Learn to detach your self-worth from being right. Instead of seeking to win arguments, focus on healthy dialogues where both parties can learn and grow. 7. You enjoy seeing others fail or feel envious of their success. Why this happens: When success is tied to external validation, others' achievements can feel like a threat to your own self-worth. Solution: Practice genuine happiness for others' success. This helps shift your mindset from scarcity to abundance, reminding you that there's enough success for everyone. 8. You crave attention or seek validation from others. Why this happens: The desire for attention often comes from an internal void that hasn’t been filled with self-love. Solution: Develop self-compassion and practice being alone without needing external distractions or validation. Meditation and mindfulness can help strengthen your internal sense of worth. 9. You find yourself people-pleasing, sacrificing your own needs to win approval. Why this happens: People-pleasing is a classic form of seeking approval, as it focuses on making others happy at your own expense. Solution: Set boundaries and practice saying no. Realize that your worth isn’t dependent on how much you do for others, but on being true to yourself. 10. You love hearing compliments and constantly seek external praise. Why this happens: Compliments can feel validating, but relying on them can create dependency. Solution: Instead of seeking external praise, learn to give yourself compliments. Practice affirmations and build a positive internal dialogue to reinforce your self-esteem. 11. You struggle to let go of past failures, fearing judgment. Why this happens: Fear of judgment ties your self-worth to your past mistakes. Solution: Embrace failure as a learning experience. Everyone makes mistakes—what matters is how you grow from them. Develop resilience by practicing self-forgiveness. 12. You try too hard to persuade others to believe what you believe. Why this happens: Needing others to agree with you stems from a fear of being wrong or misunderstood. Solution: Accept that not everyone will share your beliefs, and that’s okay. Let go of the need to convince others, focusing instead on having open, respectful discussions. 13. You have an insistent need to be right all the time. Why this happens: Being right can feel like a way to affirm your intelligence or competence. Solution: Practice intellectual humility. Recognize that learning from others, and being open to new ideas, is more valuable than always being right. 14. You frequently complain or seek sympathy from others. Why this happens: Seeking sympathy can be a way of attracting attention and approval from others. Solution: Shift from complaining to problem-solving. Take ownership of your challenges and focus on solutions rather than seeking sympathy. 15. Others' opinions and judgments have a strong impact on your emotions and self-worth. Why this happens: When your self-esteem is based on others' opinions, you become vulnerable to external judgments. Solution: Practice detaching from others’ opinions. Ask yourself, “What do 'I' think?” and work on building a strong internal sense of self that isn’t swayed by external views. 16. You take credit for other people’s work to gain approval. Why this happens: This behavior arises from a desire to appear more competent or accomplished than you feel. Solution: Acknowledge the contributions of others openly and practice gratitude. Recognize that collaboration can be more rewarding than personal accolades. Overcoming approval-seeking behavior is a journey that requires patience and self-awareness. By recognizing these signs and adopting healthier practices, you can shift from relying on external validation to fostering inner confidence and peace. Imagine how liberating and peaceful it would feel to let go of the burden of seeking approval in your life. Cultivating self-esteem from within empowers you to live authentically and freely, without the constant pressure to seek validation from others. If ego gratification fuels your cause, you might resort to unethical actions to satisfy it, risking burnout and even severe irreversible consequences. A lasting motivation requires a higher purpose beyond self-preservation to endure a lifetime. Consider the contrasting stories of Lance Armstrong and Mahatma Gandhi. Armstrong's ego-driven decisions in professional cycling, such as doping scandals, resulted in a downfall. In contrast, Gandhi, motivated by a higher purpose of justice and societal improvement, pursued nonviolent resistance for India's independence. Reflect on whose legacy endures—Armstrong's with consequences or Gandhi's with lessons for current and future generations. Who would you aspire to be? - Feelasoulphy To dissolve one’s ego it must be penetrated from the inside because the ego is an extremely effective natural survival mechanism that’s designed to protect the person from any outside attack. Therefore, force seldom works against someone with a lot of pride. Change must be a choice chosen by the heart that ultimately transcends the ego. - Feelasoulphy Pride and ego hinder growth. So, the more pride and ego you have the less you will grow. - Feelasoulphy The ego never desires true happiness for you because it doesn’t comprehend what it is. The ego only wants to be high from one moment to the next so it has you addicted to the feeling. If you are seeking for long lasting true happiness, ask your heart. It knows exactly where it is. - Feelasoulphy Ego demands respect. Humility is respect. Ego uses force to demand respect, but it often ends up with the opposite of what it wants. On the other hand, humility is respect. It needs nothing more or less to obtain what it already is. - Feelasoulphy Once your heart is open you will receive the truth and wisdoms of God/Universe. You will no longer be bounded by the limits of the ego. - Feelasoulphy Always pay close attention to the advice that’s given by a terminally ill person. They speak the truth because their ego starts to die before their physical body. - FeelaSoulphy |
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