 Bella From the day we’re born, we are entangled with love. It begins before we even know the word—when we’re held, fed, smiled at (or not). That early interaction sets a blueprint for what love feels like. And more importantly, it shapes how we believe we must behave in order to receive it. Most people assume love is just a spiritual ideal—something soft and poetic that we strive for in relationships or spiritual teachings. But what most don’t realize is this: Love is also psychological. Love is biological. Love is survival. When people behave badly—when they lie, control, dominate, brag, lash out—it doesn’t look like love at all. But if you trace it all the way back to the root, it always leads to love. Or more specifically: the need to be loved. The Example of Donald Trump Let’s take a figure who represents dominance, pride, and controversy: Donald Trump. To many, he’s arrogant, aggressive, self-obsessed, divisive. He boasts about being a winner, having the best words, the highest ratings, the strongest policies. He demands loyalty. He hates being criticized. He portrays himself as the savior of America and insists the world recognize his greatness. At first glance, none of this sounds like a man seeking love. It sounds like a man seeking power. But look closer. Power is often a substitute for love. It’s what people reach for when they don’t believe they can simply be loved for who they are. When a person constantly brags, what are they really saying? “Please see me. Please tell me I matter. Please validate that I’m good enough.” When someone can’t tolerate being wrong, they’re often screaming inside: “I don’t feel safe being vulnerable. If I’m flawed, I won’t be loved.” Everything becomes a performance to prove their worth—because deep down, they never felt loved without having to earn it. Broken Strategies for Love We all have our own twisted strategies for getting love, based on what we learned in childhood. Some people:
Trump’s behavior is just a loud, extreme example of what we all do in subtler ways. If you look past the politics, the headlines, and your opinion of him—you’ll see a scared child inside a powerful man, still trying to prove he is worthy of love. This Isn’t About Justifying Harm Understanding that people are wounded doesn’t mean excusing bad behavior. Compassion and accountability must coexist. But when we look at human behavior through the lens of “This person is trying to get love in the only way they know how,” it breaks the cycle of judgment and hatred. And it helps us do the same for ourselves. Love: The Hidden Force Behind It All This is why spiritual teachers keep saying: “Life is all about love.” Not because it’s a feel-good phrase, but because it’s the underlying motivator behind everything we do. Whether we’re succeeding, sabotaging, pushing people away, or drawing them close-- we’re just trying to get back to the feeling of being safe, seen, and accepted. We want what we were born for. We want what the soul remembers. We want love. This is also why so many people love having pets. On a conscious or unconscious level, we are drawn to animals because they offer us an experience of unconditional love—whether we’re receiving it or giving it. Your dog doesn’t care how much money you make or how many mistakes you’ve made. They love you when you’re a mess and when you’re on top of the world. They’re excited to see you come home and sad when you leave. That’s not neediness—it’s devotion. Remember this: you may have many people in your life, but your pet only has you. You are their one and only source of love. So be gentle with them. Take good care of them. They too just want to feel loved—just like you. A Practice for Reflection Next time you catch yourself:
Pause and ask: “What am I really trying to get right now?” “How am I trying to get love?” Then take it a step further and ask: “Who might be hurting because of how I’m trying to get love?” “What is the cost of my unmet needs for the person on the receiving end?” And when you witness someone else behaving badly, try asking: “What twisted strategy for love might they be using?” Just because you’re trying to feel loved doesn’t mean others aren’t feeling unloved in the process. Be mindful: the ways we reach for love—if rooted in fear, control, or insecurity—can push others away or even harm them. And when that happens, we’re not only not getting the love we want, we’re also blocking the love we already have. Healing begins with awareness. Love begins with responsibility. Final Thought The world doesn’t need more punishment. It needs more understanding. It needs more people willing to look beneath the behavior and see the wound. That doesn’t mean tolerating abuse or enabling harm. It means living from the wisdom that says: “Even the most unlovable-seeming person is trying, in their own broken way, to be loved.” That, too, includes you. This post is dedicated to my favoriate dog in the world - Bella, who guided me to this deeper realization about love. Read: The Healing Power of Love
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 President Donald Trump adn Elon Musk speak before departing the White House on March 14th. Photo Credit: CNBC Imagine sitting in a car. You’re the observer. But who’s driving? For most people, the answer is the ego—firmly gripping the wheel, speeding toward desires, defending against imagined threats, chasing approval, status, and power. Meanwhile, the higher self—the wise, calm navigator—sits quietly in the backseat. But what happens when we let ego drive not just our lives, but our entire world? Let’s explore what the ego truly is, why it exists, how it functions in the brain, and what happens when we allow it to dominate—individually and collectively. What Is the Ego? In psychology, the ego is the part of our mind that helps us function in the world. It negotiates between our instincts (id), moral ideals (superego), and external reality. It forms a sense of identity—the “I” that interacts with the world. In spirituality, the ego is the false self. It’s the mask we wear, the roles we play, the stories we believe about who we are. It operates in separation, fear, and comparison. It says, “I am this body, this status, this job, this belief.” But none of those are truly you. How the Ego Operates in the Brain The ego thrives on dopamine—the brain’s reward chemical. Every time you receive praise, a win, a like on social media, or prove someone wrong, the ego feels validated. You get a dopamine hit. You feel important. But it doesn’t last. This is why the ego constantly chases--more money, more validation, more control. It also reacts quickly to threats, real or perceived. A raised eyebrow can feel like an attack. The ego’s job is to protect the false identity it has created. So it responds with anger, pride, defensiveness—or aggression. It was once useful for survival. But now, it mostly defends illusions. When the Ego Causes Suffering Let’s say someone insults you. You feel rage. That’s the ego defending its image. In that moment, you suffer from the intensity of the emotion—and you may hurt someone else in response. The ego’s mission is to maintain its version of truth. It justifies its reactions and rarely admits fault. That’s why it’s hard for people trapped in ego to back down, apologize, or reflect. This isn’t just personal—it’s collective. The Rise of the Ego-System We live in an Ego-System—a society built to feed and reward egoic behavior. From advertisements that say, “Look what they have—you need this too,” to social media platforms that reward attention-seeking and outrage, we are constantly being trained to feed our false self. The bigger the ego, the bigger the desires—and the greater the consumption. Success is often measured not by inner peace or love, but by how much you have, how loud you are, and how many people follow you. This system has normalized ego-driven behavior. We excuse it, reward it, even admire it. Famous Examples: When Ego Rules Let’s take a closer look at a few familiar figures: Donald Trump Regardless of politics, he’s widely seen as someone with a strong ego. His success has often come through fear-based negotiation, force, and bold self-promotion. In an ego-driven society, that’s effective. We say, “He gets things done,” even if the cost is emotional, relational, or moral. But this approach brings long-term damage—internally and externally. Resistance follows force. Power built on fear cannot bring peace. Elon Musk A visionary with enormous ambition, but his unfiltered tweets and provocative behavior reveal a restless ego at work. He may create groundbreaking innovations, but the thrill of ego often takes center stage—sometimes overshadowing the mission. This isn’t judgment—it’s observation. We all have ego. But the bigger it grows, the harder it is to see clearly. History Doesn’t Lie Let’s reflect on the past:
The ego always crashes. It’s not a question of if—but when. No illusion can last forever. What’s built on fear, separation, and pride will eventually collapse under its own weight. The Alternative: Letting the Soul Drive The ego isn’t evil. It’s just not meant to lead. The goal isn’t to kill the ego—it’s to move it to the backseat. Let your higher self—your soul, your truth, your deeper wisdom—take the wheel. The ego can still speak up when it needs to protect or push you into action. But it doesn’t need to drive your decisions, relationships, or life purpose. Because a life led by ego may win battles—but it loses peace. And a world led by ego might gain power—but it sacrifices soul. A Final Reflection We are in a time of heightened ego momentum. The world feels louder, angrier, and more divided. That’s not just coincidence—it’s the ego-system in full swing. But awareness is the beginning of transformation. Notice the voice in your mind that demands, defends, and divides. Then ask: Who is really driving? When the soul leads, the path is slower, softer, but infinitely wiser. Want to dive deeper into this topic or share your reflections? Leave a comment or share this article with someone navigating their own ego journey. Let’s raise collective awareness—one soul at a time.  I believe the event that happened on 1/6/2021 at the Capitol Hill has further divided us as a nation. At this point it doesn't matter if you support Trump or not or even being neutral. You have chosen a side. No one knows for sure who's right and who's wrong. There are too many speculations combined with imaginations and facts. This is similar to a couple's fight that oftentimes we just can't determine the rights and wrongs. We are not even arguing the same thing anymore. Both parties will end up losing the battle if the fight continues. In most cases, both should take some responsibilities and self-reflect on what we could have done better to prevent this from happening again. In order to move pass this, we have to come to the realization of what's more important to us, winning an argument or our relationships. The division will always exist if we don't realize this because we will always have our differences, such as the way we look and think. We need to accept this as our reality and instead of hating each other due to these differences we ought to embrace them as uniquenesses so we can learn from each other and see the world through these wonderful unique lenses. Only when we can cherish these uniquenesses will we unit the world. Additionally, we need to focus more on the similarities in us instead of differences. As long as we only see disparities, we will continue to disagree with each other. As long as we continue to call ourselves Americans, Chinese, Mexicans, Republicans, Democrats, White, Asian, Black, etc, we will never see the similarities in us. I suggest we look beyond our appearances, culture, religious beliefs, political parties, etc. Let’s see ourselves as human beings. We all have a body, mind, and soul. I believe we were all created equal with one thing we all have in common, the ability to love unconditionally. We may not all seem that way but deep down we are all capable of loving someone or something unconditionally. Once we understand this, we will be able to forgive and have compassions towards one another and live among each other with peace and harmony. Otherwise, history will indeed repeat itself that we will be torn apart in pieces and lives will be lost. This is too familiar to us because we have been here many times and the results have never changed. It's absolutely insane to repeat the same mistake again and again. Thus, let us all turn to love for answers to unite the world! And the first step is to hug our families and friends who have disagreed with us on our views and see the world through their eyes. Ask them to forgive us and tell them how much we love them regardless of our uniquenesses. Together we will be united as ONE! - FeelaSoulphy |
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