 (Part of The Story Series) Introduction: Why This Story Matters We don’t just tell ourselves stories about who we are or about the people in our lives. We also hold a powerful story about the world itself. Is it safe or dangerous? Friendly or hostile? Full of opportunity or scarcity? Evolving or falling apart? Most of us rarely realize how deeply these beliefs shape not just our choices, but the very reality we participate in creating. “The world we see is a reflection of how we see it.” How It Works in the Mind Your worldview acts like the largest filter of all — the lens through which you interpret everything.
What’s even more important: your personal worldview doesn’t just stay with you. It spreads to those you influence — friends, family, community. Collectively, our worldviews become the shared story that actually drives history. Historic Examples War Through Story Think of leaders who convinced entire nations that their survival required hating another group.
It all began with a story about the world: “They are dangerous. We must destroy them to survive.” Belief Shapes Discovery In contrast:
The collective view literally changed the map. Personal Example Maybe your parents taught you: “The world is a dangerous place. Don’t trust anyone.” Even if they meant to protect you, you might have lived decades with fear, guardedness, and missed opportunities for connection. Or perhaps you were taught: “The world is full of possibilities. People are mostly good.” This story probably made you more open, curious, and willing to try new things. Why It Matters So Much Your worldview doesn’t just stay in your head. It drives your behavior. It influences others. It becomes self-fulfilling. If enough people see the world as hopeless, they stop trying to improve it. If enough people see the world as capable of change, they act — and the world changes. Analogy: The Collective Mirror Imagine humanity standing before a giant mirror. What we see reflected back isn’t objective reality, but the sum of what we believe about the world. If billions see hostility, they behave defensively — and the world becomes hostile. If billions see possibility, they build bridges, invent, heal, and evolve. Good and Bad Stories About the World Good Examples:
Your Reflection Practice Pick a quiet time and write honestly about these prompts:
Your Assignment
Remember: Changing your story about the world is one way you help change the world itself. Closing Thought “We don’t see the world as it is, we see it as we are.” You have the power to choose how you see — and how you help shape what the world becomes. The story you hold isn’t just for you. It’s part of the story we all share. Let’s make it one worth living in. Read: Part 1: The Story We Tell About Ourselves Part 2: The Story We Tell About Others
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 Most people never question the game they’re playing. Money. Work. Consume. Repeat. But do you know the rules? Do you know who wrote them? 1. A Brief History of Money Money didn’t start as some divine truth. It was a human invention. Once upon a time, we bartered. Kings realized they could mint coins and demand taxes in those coins. Now people had to work for the king’s money just to avoid punishment. The same system has been reinforced by us perpetually. Fast forward: Governments print fiat currency. They decide the supply by setting the price of money itself—interest rates—through the Federal Reserve. They demand you pay taxes in their currency. You work your whole life for paper they print at will. That’s the original trick. And it still works. 2. How Taxes Really Work (The $1 Million Example) You think you earn $1 million? Watch the system take its cut over and over: Earn it → ~50% income tax(Fed and CA) → $500,000 left. Spend it → ~9% sales tax → ~$45,000 more gone. Seller earns it → ~50% tax on profit → ~$200,000 more gone. Seller spends → more sales tax. Save and invest? → capital gains, dividends and interests taxed. Buy property? → property tax every year. Die? → estate tax on what’s left. Here's a simple math without the rest of taxes.
Economic terms: tax cascading, double taxation, tax drag. Same money. Taxed again and again. Forever. 3. The Psychology of the Game They know your desires: Security Status Power Belonging They know your fears: Poverty Exclusion Failure Advertising, social pressure—they keep you playing. You’re told you’re a winner if you have more. More than your neighbor. More than last year. But the house always wins. 4. The Damage It Causes This game costs us more than taxes:
We forgot what wealth really is. 5. The Benefits of the System It’s not all evil. Let’s be honest. Social stability. Motivation to work. Financial responsibility. Technological advancement. Medicine, infrastructure, communication. Food and shelter. Without some system, we’d be living in chaos. But don’t confuse useful with just. Don’t confuse beneficial with fair. 6. How to Avoid Getting Played Here’s the truth: You don’t have to reject the game. You just have to know you’re playing. Learn the rules. Become aware: it’s designed to keep you working/playing. Decide when enough is enough. Don’t let money own you. Make it work for you. Don’t choose money over love, relationships, kindness. Find your true purpose beyond accumulation. Serve others without asking for money. Minimize your taxes legally. Build income streams that don’t kill you. Become heart-centered instead of money-centered. Work on yourself so you can tame your fears and desires which makes you less prone to others' control and manipulation. Realize your purpose is not to hoard fake paper. Wake up. See the truth. Don’t kill yourself—or others—for money. Final Words Play the game. But don’t get played. Life is not about winning in someone else’s casino. Life is about remembering who you are. What you love. What you stand for. And living it—fully, freely, consciously.  Bay Bridge, San Francisco-Oakland, California, USA Growing Up Without Boundaries: My Personal Story Growing up in an authoritative household, I never really had the space to explore my own preferences. My mother made the decisions for me—what I should do, feel, and want. There was no room for my opinions. That pattern shaped me into someone incredibly easygoing—too easygoing, to the point where I didn’t know where I ended and others began. I became someone who just went along with whatever others wanted, thinking that was the path of least resistance. And sure, on one hand, it made me flexible and able to enjoy almost any situation. But the cost? I lost touch with what I wanted. The Cost of Not Having Boundaries I struggled with making decisions. I’d let others take the lead—not out of respect, but out of habit and fear of conflict. I didn’t speak up when something bothered me. And when people—often unknowingly—crossed lines I didn’t even know I had, I’d silently stew. I’d build resentment. And then, instead of addressing the issue, I’d retreat. I became passive-aggressive, slowly backing out of relationships without ever really explaining why. What Healthy Boundaries Really Mean It took me years to realize: boundaries aren’t walls to keep people out. They’re bridges to help others meet us where we are. But to even build that bridge, we have to know where we stand. Boundaries Are a Form of Self-Love and Self-Respect One of the most powerful truths I’ve learned is this: boundaries are not just about protecting yourself from others. They are acts of self-love and self-respect. When you set a boundary, you are sending a message to yourself and the world: "I matter. My feelings, my needs, and my energy deserve to be honored." This is not selfish—it’s sacred. Without boundaries, we give too much, we say yes when we mean no, we bend until we break. And slowly, we disconnect from ourselves. But when we start setting healthy limits, we rebuild that connection. We begin to treat ourselves the way we want others to treat us. And something beautiful happens: when we respect ourselves, others learn to respect us too. Setting boundaries isn’t just about making your life more peaceful—it’s about making your relationships more authentic. When people know what you need and where you stand, they can engage with you honestly, without guessing or overstepping. It’s not only a gift to yourself; it’s a gift to everyone you love. Loving yourself enough to set boundaries is one of the most courageous and compassionate things you can do—not just for you, but for everyone around you. Why Self-Awareness Comes First The first step to creating healthy personal boundaries is self-awareness. We can’t communicate what we need until we understand what makes us feel seen, respected, and safe. Sometimes, what we call a boundary is actually a wound—a sore spot from the past. If someone’s words or actions offend us, it’s worth asking: is this about them, or is it a reflection of something I haven’t healed yet? When we don't do that inner work, we risk setting boundaries based on fear, not freedom. We might end up pushing away the very experiences and people who could help us grow. Examples of Healthy vs. Unhealthy Boundaries That’s why I believe in healthy boundaries—those that are rooted in clarity, not confusion. Here are a few examples: Unhealthy Boundary: “I never let anyone get close to me because I don’t want to be hurt.” Healthy Boundary: “I take my time getting to know people and only open up when I feel emotionally safe.” Unhealthy Boundary: “If someone says something I don’t like, I cut them off immediately.” Healthy Boundary: “If something upsets me, I take a moment to reflect and then have a calm conversation about it.” Unhealthy Boundary: “I let people do whatever they want so I don’t cause drama.” Healthy Boundary: “I express my needs clearly and respectfully, knowing that honest communication builds stronger connections.” How to Communicate Boundaries Effectively Once you've done the inner work and become clear on what your boundaries are, the next step is learning how to express them in a way that is both firm and compassionate. Here are a few proven methods for communicating personal boundaries: 1. Use "I" Statements This helps reduce defensiveness and keeps the focus on your feelings.
2. Be Direct, Not Aggressive Kindness and firmness can coexist. Express your needs without attacking.
3. Set Clear Consequences Boundaries without consequences are just suggestions.
4. Repeat and Reinforce You might have to restate your boundary more than once.
Final Thoughts: Practice Makes Progress Boundaries aren’t about creating distance. They’re about creating clarity. They let others know how to love and respect us. And they teach us how to love and respect ourselves. So if you’ve struggled with boundaries like I have, be gentle with yourself. You’re not broken. You’re learning. Boundaries aren’t something you suddenly master—they’re something you practice. And the more you practice, the more your relationships—starting with the one you have with yourself—begin to thrive.  Fear is like a cage. It protects you from the outside, yet it traps you in from the inside. Did you forget you have the key to the door? - Feelasoulphy  Fear based decisions will only produce more fear for you, but love based decisions will yield more love back to you. Which will you choose? - Feelasoulphy  I might have not won the war yet but I have won the battle today by not defeating anyone else but myself. - Feelasoulphy  I’m a financial advisor by trade but when I’m not working I’m spending a lot of time contemplating about life because life really fascinates me! It’s one of those things that you will never know what is really about because it changes constantly as you evolve every second. What life means to you may not mean the same to others. Since no one has THE answer about the meaning of life it becomes how we perceive life individually. In other words, we live in a reality that we have created entirely based on our own unique perceptions of what life should be at the moment. Therefore, at this very moment, life to me is like this… For over 20 years being a financial advisor I never really put the two together until recently it came to me as another profound realization of life. It happened to be on a day that I didn’t feel well mentally. While I was reflecting on how crappy I felt at that moment something just clicked! I realized how many of these crappy moments I had felt in the past years of my life. I don’t track these moments but if I have to guess I’d say probably in the thousands! Now, I’m not saying I had a very terrible day that I felt depressed. It was one of those days that I just didn’t feel very positive. A series of negative thoughts arose all of the sudden for no reason, however, for the most part, I must say I’m a very positive person and I am well aware this is normal. Anyway, I realized that after thousands of these moments I still managed to survive and became the person I am happy to be today. I asked myself if I’d go back in time to change all those little crappy moments. My answer was a firm NO! Not only would I not get rid of those moments in my life, I also wouldn’t erase the darkest period of times that I went through to get here. Why? Because without them I wouldn’t be exactly who I am today. When I say “them” I mean every part of my being, every difficult situation I went through, every person I met, every trouble I got into, every “F” I scored from my exams, every mistake I made, every cold I had, every bruise I got, every tear I dropped, every pain I endured, every negative or positive thought I had, every emotion I felt, every moment of loneliness and fear I experienced, etc. You get the point. To reject any of them is to be ungrateful of my past, or the life lessons I had been given, and not accepting or being unsatisfied with who and where I am today. There are still many things I need to work on but that doesn’t mean I’m not satisfied with what I have accomplished so far. As long as I’m aware that my personal development is a lifelong process and I have things to work on I know I’m on the right track. Believing I can only get better from here is what keeps me going! With this mindset I will not be ungrateful of whatever the universe presents to me and I know happiness is just within arms reach. Let me demonstrate this logic with the Dow Jones Industrial Average historical chart since this is what I’m familiar with. Believe or not the two resemble each other awfully a lot. Let’s call this chart the Dow Jones Individual Average and let’s pretend this is your life as Dow Jones.  Chart 1 illustrates your lifespan from the day you were born to the day you passed away. I know this might look too good to be true because our average lifespan is not that long but this was the best chart I could find so we’re going to have to work with what I got! (Full disclosure: I’m not a good chart maker.) This seems like a pretty typical life in America if you ask me. It’s a good life but it’s nothing extraordinary or extremely dramatic. You might argue that this is not typical or this is too good of a life or this is okay or whatever, but I’ll ask for your patience until the end of the demonstration so you will see my point. I believe this chart is self-explanatory so I’m not going into each event that’s marked on the chart. To summarize this chart, I’ll say life is unpredictable and it has its ups and downs. Some days you are on the top of the world and other days you are in the deepest ditch that you feel like you will never climb out of! However, life somehow finds its way to go on and finishes strong! Let’s take a closer look at one event to understand better what I’m showing you. You see that big dip around 1930? You seem to be experiencing some kind of melt-down during that time after your divorce with Lynn. You were even suicidal. It took you a while to get out of that dip. I’m glad you didn’t pull the trigger or else you wouldn’t have had such a beautiful life later and given even more beautiful lives to so many of your offspring for generations to come. Your decision to continue living was a good one to say the least. If you didn’t know, this is The Great Depression that happened in the history of the US. Just in a couple of years, DJIA dropped from 386.10 to 40.60. That’s almost a 90% decline! If you invested $100k to begin with now you only have $10k left! Ouch!  Zooming into the chart, here you can see why you were suicidal. You experienced a mental breakdown and watched your life freefalling! I can only imagine what you went through during that time. Nevertheless, good for you that you didn’t fold. You didn’t give up. You didn’t realize your losses. In finance, we believe that money invested in the stock market is just paper money that has no real value until the profit or loss is realized, meaning to sell your positions. Once sold, you will be able to collect the proceeds or materialize your losses. At that time, everything is finalized with that particular transaction. If you made a profit you will be able to keep your profit for good if you never invest it again. However, if you lose money you will not gain your money back unless you go back into the market and even if you do there’s no guarantee you will gain it all back. I have seen this many times in my short 21 year career that people exit at the wrong time and they never had another chance to make it back in for a while because the market rebounded too quickly. Last year’s COVID correction was a good example. Even if you do make back what you lost long after you have already missed the opportunity to make more because you missed the beginning part of the recovery. For the younger folks this type of loss may still be tolerable but for the ones that are approaching retirement or already in retirement it can be catastrophic. They may never make the money back due to lack of time. You can see in chart 3 below, it took the market almost 30 years to get back to its original point in the 1930's. If you committed suicide that would have been the end of your life where you would not have had another opportunity to recover from this and learned from your mistakes to improve your life for the better. You’d have lost forever! Talking about bad days, there have been some really terrible ones in the life of Dow’s. You can see from chart 2 that the worst one yet was on 10/19/1987. In one day, it dropped 22.61%! I don’t know about you, even for a financial professional like myself would have felt like the end of the world is approaching! But that too shall pass and it certainly has! Although when you are in the middle of the drop it can feel like it’s never going to end if you can hold onto this wild ride for just a little longer you will see the light at the end of the tunnel. See chart 3. In this chart, I want to show you why you should always hang on tight and you will always get through the tough times. There’s no drop that is too big for you to rebound in life unless life ends! It’s worth mentioning that in investing, there are times that you have to strategically “quiet” or take your losses due to opportunity cost, this means you can potentially benefit more if you use your time and resources somewhere else. We can tactically manage the accounts where we are free to go in and out of the market as we wish to seek opportunities to maximize profits or minimize risks. That would be part of capitalizing the opportunities during market volatilities. We also don’t need to wait for 30 years for the market to rebound completely! Without these drops it’ll be hard for us to get into the market with new money. We are always looking for these opportunities to enter, re-enter, and exit the market temporarily. Of course, the gain is never guaranteed, but what is guaranteed is the learning experiences which can potentially help us succeed in the future. This is how all portfolio managers learned to manage portfolios. However, in order to do this it requires us to stay in the game without being completely checked out forever. This is also similar to poker games in which your goal is to last as long as your last opponent so you have a chance to see the opportunities presented to you to make a comeback. Here’s a formula for you if you want to succeed at whatever you want to accomplish in life. It's a simple one and anyone can do it. Chances are you are already doing it without awareness so this formula will give you a nice clean visual to help you comprehend this process better. I believe it’s one thing to be successful and another to understand and remember how you became successful. If you have a formula to success you can duplicate the formula for anything you do.  Risks + Failures + Time = Experiences + Opportunities = Success
Risks: Anything you want to do that makes you feel fearful or uncomfortable because it could cost you something you value. Failures: Anything you tried to do but not able to achieve your desired outcome. Time: Anything + Time will create changes. Time = Patience. If you don’t have patience you don’t have time on your side. You will last as long as your patience lasts you. Experiences: This is acquired from the total of the first part of the equation. Opportunities: Without the first 4 this is hard to come by and even when they are presented to you you wouldn’t recognize what they look like. Success: This doesn’t have to be the ultimate success you are trying to achieve. You can see on the chart where I have placed it in multiple points. In reality, they are everywhere, but because they are not THE success we are trying to reach they are often overlooked. Every success involves the first 5 elements including the big one you are shooting for but don’t forget to celebrate the small ones because they are building you up to the big one! If you understand how you have achieved every little success you will eventually figure out how to get to your final goal. To summarize my findings, I realized that my moment of crappiness was very temporary just like all the other thousands of them I had before. It took me 1 min to get out of that one crappy mood by realizing how great and important the other crappy moments were. All of them together summed up the person I am today. For that reason, I wouldn’t trade them in for anything! Furthermore, I realized that had I not been working on myself for the past years to become a more positive person it might have taken me a lot longer to get over that crappy feeling. With this elevated self-awareness I was able to see it from a slightly different angle even maybe as small as by taking one tiny step to the left. This proves how critical self-development is. Thus, I believe the only project we are working on in life is ourselves and no one else. Your life is based on how you perceive it. The more angles you see the better chance you will not get stuck in life for long. You will be able to quickly maneuver out of certain situations and free yourself from the long lasting agony. Sometimes, you can be one thought away from becoming depressed or getting out of depression. The ability to perceive in a multidimensional way is a valuable life tool to get unstuck so you will walk further in life to see that light at the end of the tunnel. Remember, all you have to do is to hang on tight and give it time and patience. So long as you are still in the game you will have the opportunities to get better and even succeed in life. Everyone experiences the ups and downs and there’s no way to avoid the downs. However, if you can find the opportunities in the midst of chaos you will be able to get back into the market and stay in the game! The more experiences you gain the better chances you will succeed in the future. That’s why I put “Experiences” in the 3rd chart to show you that the graph is not representing wealth accumulation but life experiences. With these valuable experiences you can take on the toughest challenges in life and ensure your life will be continuing on an upward trajectory like the DJIA. Additionally, this is the same for relationships and marriages. Oftentimes we are tempted to walk out of our relationships because that’s the easiest thing to do - to not deal with it. In the end, we find ourselves continuing to face the same issues, just with different people in different situations. Sometimes, all we need is more time and patience and the willingness to work on ourselves instead of our partner to get over that hump. Lastly, I’d like to end this by saying that we have the power to create our own life chart. There’s not one way to draw it because it’s fully customizable to our individual desires! Regardless how it has turned out so far there’s always a chance to make positive changes as long as we are still here. Let’s go out there and paint the most beautiful chart of our life!  Love is Natural. Fear is Artificial. Love is Eternal. Fear is Provisional. Love Creates. Fear Destroys; yet Love Recreates and Restores again. Love > Fear Embrace Love and not Fear! - FeelaSoulphy  When you can be true to yourself and others, you will not have fear. When you are fearless, no one or any force can control you or manipulate you. It's simply impossible. - FeelaSoulphy |
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