Don’t quickly react to other people’s words and actions instead understand that how they treat you is how they have been treated. The anger they project on you displays how much they are in pain. They want you to feel exactly how they feel from inside. Especially if you are the one that hurt them. Don’t continue to give the power to their ego. The more you feed their ego the bigger your ego gets. ​

​- FeelaSoulphy

In a relationship, controlling is when you try to fit your partner into your own world. You are essentially trying to take someone else’s freedom away! 

Everyone creates their own realities based on their unique personal experiences. We have built a belief system around rules and regulations that we follow as our life principles. This is perfectly fine for ourselves until we expect our partners to also follow our rules and beliefs. When they don’t, we feel disappointed and try to force our rules upon them. This controlling behavior that we all have acted on is purely for self-preservation purpose. We wonder why our relationship don’t last. Who wants to live under someone else’s rules that they don’t understand? We have to realize that what we believe right sometimes only applies to ourselves. This is our own reality that we live in and not anyone else’s. Although we share a common outer universe our inner worlds can be drastically different from each other’s because of our unique past(I call this “Parallel Universes”.) We should never force our partners to follow our own rules because they were never made for them. Respect their universe like we wish them to respect ours. Trying to take another person’s freedom away is not only selfish but also very damaging to your relationships.

​- FeelaSoulphy

Nothing is ever (out) there because everything is always (in) here.

​Whatever you’re chasing in life, whether it’s love, happiness, God, money, cars, etc, if you think it’s out there somewhere you’re making a fundamental mistake, but it’s a very naive and adorable mistake that we humans make. Essentially, we’re confused about WHERE that thing we’re chasing really is. Our eyes are telling us that it’s out there somewhere and it seems so close to us all the time. It’s always within our reach for some reason yet it feels so far. We continue to believe only if we work a little harder and get better at what we do we’ll achieve it. Little did we know, when we get there it’s not there just like a mirage. It magically disappears after a short while. This is why we continue to acquire material things in life to try to get THERE. We have to realize that the thing we want is never THERE, it’s always HERE but we just never see it. We couldn’t believe it was that close to us and it was that easy to obtain. 

Keep this in mind, whatever you desire that you think it’s your ultimate goal in life is simply the feelings and emotions that created by the experiences you go through. These feelings and emotions ARE the end result of your experiences within, 100% of the times! Nothing you want is outside YOU. Everything lies inside YOU. They originated from inside and they come right back to you. You are the projector and the receiver(There will be another post on this). Why do you think your dreams feel so real? Although it’s not real it affects your emotions when you wake up from them. But you never needed anything tangible to create those experiences which created those feelings and emotions, did you? Why do you want your dream car or dream house? Because it makes you feel good? Doesn’t that manifestation come from an inner desire? When you finally get them, how do you feel? Where is that feeling of accomplishment from? Inside again! You spend your entire life chasing after something that you can easily obtain within. Why would you put yourself through that? Stop going out there to get it and start looking within. And remember, the best time is never yesterday nor tomorrow, it’s always NOW.

​- FeelaSoulphy

Fear is the reason that people want to control and manipulate each other. Fear is also the reason people allow others to control and manipulate them. Therefore, being fearless means being free from suffering!

When one is trying to control the other and the person allows to be controlled, this is actually a sign that both parties are afraid of losing each other. So why play the control game if both want the same thing and value the relationship equally? Be vulnerable with each other and face your fears together! Fear is your true common enemy, not each other! Work as a team and don’t let fear break us apart! Remember, the controller and manipulator suffer as well because they are always met with massive amount of resistance all the time.

​- FeelaSoulphy

Insecurity leads to jealousy. Jealousy leads to more insecurity and more jealousy.

Until you find the root of this problem and face it head on you will always be incapable of keeping a confident partner no matter how much they love you. Your partner will eventually see your insecurities and leave you for someone else. This is because they are confident and they believe they are capable of finding someone they truly deserve. They have worked hard on their confidence to prepare for someone that’s also worked on themselves to prepare for them. If you are still insecure and have the tendency to be jealous it’s time to start working on yourself, and NOT blaming anyone else. If you are still single, I promise you that once YOU are ready, your true soulmate will appear. BE the person you want to be with unless you desire someone that’s also insecure and jealous.

In addition, when your insecurity attacks someone else it’s a clear sign that you are still not confident about something. YOU are allowing and giving others the power to threaten you. And you don’t believe you can satisfy your partner’s needs due to your own incompetence. Instead of attacking others, you should see what YOU need to improve to get to a place that you no longer fear of losing your partner to someone else because you know what you have to offer. If your partner doesn’t recognize your qualities it may mean they are not ready for you or they are not the right fit and perhaps someone else will appreciate your qualities who is ready for you. Be aware that your insecurity will also try to control and manipulate your partner to satisfy your own ego. Don’t use your partner or anyone else as a tool to feed your ego. It’s not fair to them.  

​- FeelaSoulphy

​Sometimes we are afraid to look at ourselves in the mirror. Especially in the morning. The bed hair, the bags under the eyes, the new wrinkles showed up overnight, etc. Whatever it is it doesn’t make us feel good about ourselves. We know that before stepping out of the door we must make sure we look at our best. However, we can’t see ourselves unless we have a mirror. And we need a clean one to see clearly because a dirty mirror will not show us everything we need to see. 

In a healthy relationship, such as a friendship or a romantic relationship, the right partner will help us expose our weaknesses that we can’t detect on our own. This is very much like what a mirror does for our physical appearance but instead it reflects our inner self. Unfortunately, often times in order to bring these deep rooted issues to the surface there’s no better way than conflicts and confrontations; which may involve a lot of intense emotions from both sides. These emotions might be difficult to endure at the moment, however they can be great tools to help us achieve breakthroughs with those unresolved issues that are hindering our growth.  

Sometimes we may need more than one mirror to look at ourselves from different angles all at once. We need to find the mirrors that will display the true us, even though we might not like what we see at first, however I promise you that a clean mirror will show us exactly what we need to see. Otherwise, we would only be living in our own imaginations.  

Find the best/clearest mirrors you can find and be the best/clearest mirror you can be. And make sure you take good care of those mirrors and keep them clean to show your appreciations at all times because the better/cleaner the mirror the better you see yourself and your soul’s purposes.

​- FeelaSoulphy

​These things cannot exist in the same place and at the same time within one’s self,

​Hot and Cold,
Joy and Pain,
Love and Hate,
Anger and Compassion,
Revenge and Kindness,
Jealousy and Encouragement,
Freedom and Control,
Respect and Contempt,
Positivity and Negativity,
Gratitude and Greed,
Fear and Courage,
Care and Selfish,
Forgiveness and Resentment, 
Faith and Doubt,
Guilt and Self-Love,
Unity and Separation,
Patience and Impulsiveness,
Judgement and Empathy,
Truth and Lies,
Life and Death,

You possess the free will to choose. However, when you choose one, the other simply vanishes. Choose wisely!

​- FeelaSoulphy

You: Why me?! 
God: No worries my child. Whom would you like it to be? 
You:  Ok, why now? 
God: Now we are talking! Remember what you have asked for? 

​-FeelaSoulphy